Losing My Religion

I believe in god. I do not believe in religion.

I believe in learning. I'm not sure I believe in education.

I believe in fate. I also, at the same time, do not believe in fate.


I don't believe in belts that don't hold anything up, or in giving high-5s (unless the recipient is mentally challenged), or in pennies.

I don't believe in bagels that aren't pre-sliced.

I believe that black people are more highly evolved, and that my freckles are trying to tell me something.

I believe that libraries are more sacred than churches.

I believe that people who spray me with perfume samples at the mall should be shot in the head.

I have an inkling of a belief that I might be slightly over-reactionary.

I believe that John Cusack has indeed made life harder for all men, but I do not believe that any woman should settle for less than her perfect boom-box moment.

I believe in Sex. I would like to believe in Love. I'm not sure how.

I don't believe in regrets.

I do believe in moisturizer.

I believe in hard work, I just don't want to.

I don't believe in sweet-flavoured toothpaste, smoked meats, or flannel sheets.

I believe that Elvis is dead, and so is disco. I also believe in ghosts.

I believe in the goodness of laughter, and tongue kisses, and red wine.

I don't believe in magic. I don't believe in sin. I do believe in karma.

I believe in a thing called Soul.

What do you believe?