Friday, October 22, 2004

Morning Bells are Ringing

It's vomitous, really, to live in a place where there are honest to goodness bells ringing this early in the morning. They don't disturb my slumber really, but if I'm awake to hear them, I still think it's strange. Stuff like that should only happen in Cinderella...by which I guess I mean whatever time that was set in. In her rustic village where she hand-fed her chickens in the morning and sewed dresses for royal balls. Well, okay, so there was probably never a time where Cinderella is plausible, but it was at least 100 years ago, right? I mean, the mode of transportation was pumpkins, so that's gotta tell you something.

I'm not really a Cinderella kind of girl anyway. I really like Mulan...now there's a girl I can understand. I remember going to see it at the Port, at a matinee, and Anna and I sat in the front row trying to pretend that we weren't the only ones in the theatre above the age of 7 AND the only ones in the theatre not throwing popcorn AND the only ones in the theatre who sat still for more than just the first 5 minutes. And Pocahontas was a good one too, but only if I'm feeling relaxed enough not to notice the glaring historical anomalies. Once when I was babysitting Paul, I watched it in French with him, and he thought it was really funny that I cried. And Lilo&Stitch, man that movie cracks me up. If you haven't seen it, you must rent it. Own it even, because you'll want to see it more than once.

Now Pixar is where it's at. Toy Story of course, was a ground-breaking movie, an instant classic, and it's shocking when you think that it's getting old. I remember Matthew jumping off rocks at the campground yelling " To Infinity... and Beyond!" and now he's a big brother to 2 little sisters who were born in a time where Toy Story has never not existed. Imagine that! I didn't see A Bug's Life until more recently, because at the time, there was a similar movie out just a bit before it called Antz, which was so cute I remained faithful to it for years. I've seen and enjoyed both now, but I still say Antz wins out. Monsters Inc and Finding Nemo are unbearably adorable. I think I just appreciate movies that won't be spawning any Disney Princesses. That's just gross. And now we can all wait, twiddling our thumbs, for the next logical step: a gay Disney couple. I mean, we all know it's high-time, but is it likely? Probably about as likely as the next Disney Princess being fat or having-eek!-short hair!

However, according to some published accounts, Disney already has some gay couples on their hands, like it or not. George Wolfe reports that earlier this month, in San Francisco, a civil ceremony was performed, uniting happy couples in love. Among them were Buzz Lightyear (gasp!) and Swedish Chef from The Muppet Show (okay, you can kind of see where that one's coming from). Wolfe reports:

"'Im joost zee heppeeest mun in zee vurld!" proclaimed the Swedish Chef. "Ja, Buzzy iz my sveetzheeart – I'm tired ooff hiding beheend my eprun. Bork Bork Bork!" Attendees were quick to gossip that, despite Buzz's flirtation with Jessie (from Toy Story), his macho posturing was a classic case of overcompensation. "Besides," said Prospector Pete, "the guy's best friend is named Woody! You do the math."

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