Saturday, January 09, 2010

Clean up in aisle 69.

Standing in the express lane at the grocery store, I wonder if the cashier will realize that all my items are foods I intend to lick off of someone's penis.

28 comments:

Jeannie said...

I wonder, if the government finds out that the grocery store is selling sex aids, if you'll have to be over 18 to shop there.

Droog said...

Don't forget that there is always room for Jello...

furiousBall said...

well, did you buy Jiff or Skippy Peanut Butter or Lick Off Penis Peanut Butter?

One of those is a sure confirmation of your intentions

Julia said...

skip the hot sauce

Unknown said...

What? No list of goober goodies? Yu might know something that I haven't tried yet (but I doubt it!)

kenju said...

LOL

D. Gage said...

Please! My mom reads this blog, for goodness sake!

Anonymous said...

lol :) did he give you that strange look ? :)

Chai said...

Ahhhh.... true love.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

What did you buy?

CanadianSwiss said...

I'll bet he didn't ;)

mo.stoneskin said...

Arrrrgh, where the hell am I? I'm lost I think, don't recognise this place.

You would lick a huge joint of raw beef of a man's penis?

Ugh.

tweetey30 said...

LOL.. Jay Jay Jay... I had to reread what you wrote because it took me by suprise....LOL..I agree with Jeannie though.. No children allowed in the grocery store any more even with adults if they government realised this...Help... Paying for a baby sitter just to go grocery shopping... We would starve here...

Jay Noel said...

Just don't get any sort of citric acid....yowza!

JMH said...

Hot fudge, chocolate syrup (strawberry maybe), Reddi Wip, peanut butter, Nutella, Cheez Whiz, Dijon mustard, vanilla frosting, mayonnaise (gross unless you're Dutch), moist towelettes.

No, I don't think a cashier necessarily draws that conclusion.

A said...

:)

BBC said...

You picked up a can of whipping cream?

BBC said...

I love to squirt it on a breast and lick it off. But that's just me.

sinner said...

dare you to post that as your facebook status

Lorna said...

even before I opened the post, I knew where you were going with this---how scary is that?

Chick said...

I hope you bought peanut butter...the chunky kind.

Jude said...

Did you buy floss?

Droog said...

Tell us the truth. You've gained an extra ten pounds recently, haven't you?

Salty Miss Jill said...

Penis-the latest eating utensil!

repliderium.com said...

I tend to look at everyone's groceries and envision then in sexual ways.

Kat E said...

just realized I have been away from your blog WAY too long :)

Maven said...

Jay--do you tweet? If not, you MUST! This would have been a hilarious tweet!

Hope you are doing well. Haven't seen any updates in a while!

Vest said...

A generous application of Vick's Vapour rub on the jolly roger would put an end to saliving on his boner.