Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Warning: Stupid Man Alert

So, canned air, eh?

No, he wasn't huffing it.

He legitimately uses it to clean things at work.

Well, he used to, anyway.

Until a coworker, in a fit of retail-induced rowdiness, sprayed it on his leg.

Despite the fact that the warning label insists that you not do this, that you avoid all contact with skin, that you never tilt the can, that disuse can cause injuries or fatalities....

Despite the fact that the can's label is thick with those little red triangular symbols showing stick men in various forms of disability, dismemberment, and death....

Despite the fact that the label also includes such ambiguous statements as Danger!, Caution!, and Warning!.....

My husband came home with frostbite.

In May.

We're not sure if the worst of the burn is from the frostbite itself, or from having to separate denim from flesh where the two had become one.

Who knew the mall had become such a hazardous workplace?

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