Thursday, February 24, 2005

Marriage Advice from Friends and Family

Okay, one last contribution to wedding week (well, 3 days, but who's counting?). There's a huge possibility that no one wants to read this, but the truth is, blogs are very self-indulgent. And I'm very self-indulgent. So when my husband set me up with this account, he knew right away that he'd created a monster. Wedding bells are in the air right now, friends are finally getting engaged, many of whom are seeking my advice because I'm the only one in our circle to have already gone through it (I realize I got married unconventionally, but it was still legally-binding, and that's what it's all about, right?). So I've been trudging out my stuff, Weddings for Dummies, and Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette (hah! that's a good one!), and it brings back a flood of memories, most of them good.

Today I am sharing some advice and good wishes from friends and family. At our reception, I decided to make books for each table. Inside we included a few stories of our relationship together so the guests could get to know us as a couple (have I mentioned that the reception was the first time I met most of Jason's family? Yeah, that was trippy). We left pens on the tables and also asked the guests to contribute their own thoughts and feelings of the night. Some were heart-warming, some were hillarious, and as the night wore on (and more drinks were poured), they became more and more interesting. Lots of weddings have guest books, but people generally only leave their names and addresses in those. These books are real treasures that are so much fun to look through, I would not hesitate to recommend this idea to anyone.

_____________________
Jason,

I must say that your wife looks quite lovely tonight!! Especially lovely. So do you, don't worry!! I have no doubt that the two of you will have a really FUN life together. Not a moment of dullness! Not with Jamie around, she's a jewel.

Jamie,

I still remember the time last year when you told me that you were getting married and I said 'No you're not, where's your ring?" and there it was, right on your ring finger. I felt like such a fool! Enjoy your life together, you deserve the best,

MLA (a good friend of mine)

___________________________________

OH you beautiful dancer in your beautiful dress. Baby I'm amazed by you.

Mmmm Cheez!

I don't even like to dance, but look at me dancing the night away. You guys know how to throw a party!

HE (friend from work)

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It's wonderful to see such a special young man meet an equally special young lady.
It has been a pleasure to watch you grow up Jason...Thank you for your friendship through the years.

-Jason's father's girlfriend

(p.s. by "special young lady" she means "girl with the big feet", which is the first thing she ever said to me -"I tried on your Doc Martens, and boy do you have big feet!")

_____________________________________

Jamie and Jason,

It's 1:25 am and I am drunk. But you should know this night has been a blast. You guys seem so happy together and I am so jealous!

RC (friend of mine)

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When Jason comes to visit the thing that strikes me the most is the amount of food he eats. With four teenage daughers that are either very picky eaters or always trying to diet, the food consumption is quite low. Add a growing Jason to the family dinner table and you have a human trash compactor. I enjoy watching him eat up all the leftovers and even when he's full he checks around to make sure there's enough for a midnight snack. Having a boy around the house has sure opened my eyes! As much as I love Jason, I'm glad I had daughters.

-my mom

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Jamie, we have so many memories together. You have a partially fake front tooth because of me and my figure skate! I remember the lemonade stands, the perms, the poisonous berries, the Care Bear dance recitals. I can’t believe you’re getting married. I keep thinking I’ll wake up in the orange tent with Patches running around and we’ll go on another adventure to find treasure. I wish you nothing but happiness and love,

SS (family friend)

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Bah humbug, I hate Christmas.
Jamie has to learn to tap dance like her Pa.

-grandfather
(As a child, it would make me very upset when he pretended not to like Christmas.)

__________________________________________

A really great name for a boy would have to be Christopher.

Chris (Jason’s friend)
(Chris and Dan thought it would be appropriate to box after the reception; they wrapped their fists in towels, and when they passed out, they were in the neighbour’s yard 2 houses over!)

___________________________________________


Jamie, you look absolutely gorgeous tonight, very happy and in love. Jason, keep up the good work. I’m sure Jamie will keep you on your toes. As for memories, I’ve known you since kindergarten, where should I begin? The loss of your pony-tail, the crush on Jean-Claude, Everfresh and Cactus Butt, the endless number of plays we put on together…Jason, your new wife has always been a little crazy. She used to run straight into the biggest and brightest objects, like conversion vans and bright red posts. She was smart though, she had special classes because she was so smart. This is how I know you won’t let her down. I’m sure she made a smart decision in deciding to spend her life with you.

LC (a very old friend)

___________________________________________

Jason,

Wassup. Sphincter says what?

-Anon

_____________________________________________________

Be careful of the words you say
To keep them soft and sweet
You never know from day to day
Which ones you’ll have to eat

BT (Jason’s aunt)

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Jamie, I love you – no I am not coming on to you – I love the fact that you are not afraid to be you…Thank you for listening to my soap opera life and giving me comfort and advice through it all. I hope that married life will not keep you too occupied to talk to moi. You caught a good one.

MN (a dear friend)

_______________________________________

I wish you luck
I wish you joy
I wish you first
A baby boy
And when his hair
Begins to curl
I wish you then
A baby girl

-Pokey
(yeah right)

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For seemingly innocent girls, the stream of sticky situations and trouble was endless, and I, for one, do not handle sticky situations well. I mean, if stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out of it, right? Apparently not. Thankfully, Jamie, our fearless and sometimes fearful leader, has always been there to help us out. It’s always been a comfort to know that should I ever land in jail, Jamie will be there to bail me out.

-sister #3

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Hi Jamie and Jason

Thanks for the great party. I riliey liked the suckirs and the chocholet.

GB (Jason’s young cousin)
(I hand made hundreds of red heart-shaped lollipops as part of our favours - hard work man!)
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As a group of married women, we would like to share our expertise with you (64 years of married life all together).

1.Remember Jason, no matter what you say, Jamie is always right.
2.When you have an argument, Jason you always have the last two words: Yes dear!
3.Never go to bed angry, even if you go to sleep at 4am.
4.Jason, when Jamie has a headache, tell her that it’s not her head that you want.

-friends of the family
(they giggled over this message all night long; between the 4 of them, not one spoke English, so this was quite a challenge!)
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Hello Jamie,
It’s your secret admirer. I have loved you ever since our days in elementary school. I was that little sexy man in the halls. I remember that day that we met at the water fountain. I dream about you every night and I will never forget you until I die.

-Anon

_______________________________________________
Your sisters tell me they want to be aunts!

-MO
(they’re no longer holding their breath!)


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I have no advice because the best advice I’ve ever been given has always come from Jamie. Just have fun and invite me over more J. Memories we’ve shared: Stereo Mike, psychedelic, Melissa’s 19th birthday, St. Patrick’s this year, etc, etc, etc. Thank you for including me in your lives.

SM (good good friend)

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